| | I don't know quite what to make of all this yet. I'm trying to be optimistic without getting my hopes up too much, which is like juggling a pie and a chainsaw.
Cassie has yet to contact me without me contacting her first... a familiar problem. I suppose she is busy, and I've been doing enough contacting her to keep the friendship going, but still. Would be nice if a woman would keep me from shouldering all the responsibility for once.
Still, there are positive signs. Two plans to hang out with her and others at the same time failed, so I asked about just having dinner and she invited me over. A girl who'd only just met me online and once in person decided to invite me into her home, where she knew it would only be the two of us... so either she took a stupid risk or she can see I'm trustworthy. We ended up talking for four hours - I showed up fifteen minutes early and stayed until she had to leave for her night time job. Turns out she's just as big a music nerd as I am... and four hours of conversation without a single awkward silence is a very good sign.
It's the holidays, and our schedules haven't been in tune much. Was tentatively having coffee with her tonight, but I called as planned and she said she couldn't make it. On the flipside, I did mention having her come over to my parents' house for our family gathering on Christmas Eve, and she said she might be able to. I'm not holding my breath, something's probably going to come up and we'll have to reschedule. Again. Sigh, and I was going to ask her out officially today too. Christmas is nice and all, and it's a good reminder, but I'll be glad when all this holiday craziness is over and I don't have to bend over backwards to find time to hang out with her. It's all I can do right now to keep from letting her slip away as so many women have. Doesn't help my heart that situations like this have ended in unexplained silence so often before. But as Holly is so fond of reminding me, those people don't deserve to be my friends if they won't act like it. Apparently I'm not the only one with this problem, though... several guys have told me lately that women have broken up with them by just ignoring them until they go away. To all the women I know: if you ever brush a guy off instead of having the decency to break up with him officially, you will no longer be my friend.
Maybe Cassie will be different. Even if we don't end up in a relationship, maybe she'll make an effort to hang out with me. And maybe, just maybe, this Christmas won't be the third in a row I spend alone.
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| | Posted 12/18/2009 7:47 PM - 10 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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